The Reason Why He Lives
by lifeisclockwork
Summary: Finally...The answers to everything...All your questions...everything finally answered. If you've got a question reply & I'll answer them...My way ofcourse. A PLEA TO BRING MIRACLES BACK! C'MON! WRITE A MIRACLES FANFIC! DONT BE LAZY! lol...
1. Prologue

_hey! this is violentpop here with a __new story__. this is also a sort of plea for anyone who reads this-GO WRITE SOMETHING ON MIRACLES! __because__ this fanfic category has been dead for like a year! and I wish that more people will write more material on this captivating and short lived series..._

_So...COME ON AND BRING MIRACLES BACK TO LIFE!_

_ok...well here goes nothing! ps. __i__ will reply to all the new stories...so __don't__ be __afraid__ that no one will read them:D_

**Prologue**

The Darkness...

It seemed to engulf him in its thorny grip...chocking him...cutting off the light and the only thing he clung onto.

Where was God?

Sometimes, the Darkness was so overpowering that he couldn't even see the end of the tunnel...doubt and pain seemed to rule his life, as he lived every day, fighting to survive.

Yes...the Darkness was indeed the lurking shadow that seemed to thrive deep in the soul...it was in everyone, every living thing. Just waiting...and watching...The Darkness was the only thing that would destroy the world, reeling chaos and war into action, and the connection between the spirit world and the living would be broken at last-the demons and the evil would win in the end. And it was Paul who would destroy the world.

As his father had found out...


	2. The Beginning of the End

**The ****Beginning**** of the End**

Paul squinted at the book. The words swam and blurred before his eyes and it was giving him a headache. Sighing, he set down the book and stretched. The rain rattling against the windows, and the grey sky casting a dark light into the small room. He checked his watch-3 pm. It was time for his afternoon studies with Poppy. Paul got up and gathered his books.

Everyday was the same-he'd wake up, study, have lunch, pray, study, have supper, do community work, pray, then go to bed. It was the same routine, over and over again. Even though he wanted to become a priest, Paul couldn't help but feel there was more to life than this. He'd hear news of people dying and masses of people left homeless or without family because of things such as natural disasters and murders. He'd feel a deep wrench in his heart, and he wished that he was out there, helping them-or at least, go see the chaos for himself...The chaos that the Lord Himself had created...

Paul grunted and shook his head. he shouldn't think of the Lord like that. After all, He has a reason for everything He does. Paul hurried over to the library and he spotted Poppy sitting at one of the large wooden tables. The library was a massive place, and it was filled to the ceiling with books, scrolls, and bits and pieces of information. Crosses and statues gazed down upon the young novices and priests-as if watching and waiting for something to happen...

"Father!"

Poppy looked up and grinned as he saw Paul hurrying over to the table. "Kiddo, you're late."

Paul sat down, out of breath, and smiled sheepishly at Poppy. "Sorry...I was trying to read and lost track of time."

Poppy nodded, "Ah...trying?"

Paul shrugged and rest his elbows on the table. "I don't know. I just can't seem to be able to concentrate anymore."

Poppy looked thoughtfully at the young man. Paul's hair was a lot messier than usual, and he had dull grey bags under his tired eyes. It was as if he hadn't slept for days.

"When was the last time you slept?" Poppy asked suddenly.

Paul shrugged again. "Last night," he lied.

Paul felt Poppy scrutinize him and he gritted his teeth. "Alright, alright. Last time I got a good night's sleep was..." He screwed up his eyes.

"You can't remember, can't you?"

"Nope. Look, it's nothing. I just have a little bit of insomnia, so what?"

Poppy turned Paul's head gently so that they were looking into each other's eyes. "Kiddo...do you really want to do this?"

Paul stared at Poppy for a while, unable to say anything. Then he finally replied, "Of course I do!"

Poppy shook his head with a wry smile. "Paul, why do you want to be a priest?"

"To help people! You of all people know this! I want to help people, and make their lives something worth living!" Paul's voice cracked as he finally said, "_I want to save their lives_, Poppy...I don't want to be like...my father."

"Then what are you doing here?" Poppy said, somewhat sharply.

Paul frowned and stared at Poppy, confusion flashing from his eyes. "What...what do you mean?"

"You know very well I am a local priest. I've worked with druggies, problem children, and grieving parents-if I know any better, the druggies are back to doing drugs, the kids are still getting into trouble, and the parents still have grief in their hearts." Poppy looked away, his eyes filled with regret. "Kiddo, if you want to save people's lives...there is so much more out there...So much pain...so much sorrow. So many lives to save..."

Paul swallowed. "So...what do you think I should do?"

Poppy looked at Paul. "Leave. I know this isn't for you. I can see it in your eyes. You want more...you want out. Well, I'm offering you this chance. If you leave, there will be a job awaiting you at the church."

"Job?"

"As a miracles investigator for the church."

Paul's mouth twitched. "_Miracles_?"

"Yes. Miracles." Poppy stood up, dismissing the lesson that never begun. "There is such a thing in the world, Paul. You of all people should know this."

And with that, he left Paul at the table, with a look of confusion, shock, and torment raging deep in his eyes.


	3. Session One

_wow this is sad. __haha__ no reviews...but what do I expect? it__'__s only been one day! __haha__. I__'__d love it if you guys spread the word about this whole __"__bring miracles back to life__"__ campaign:D_

_Now, here__'__s the next chapter...sorry my chapters are short-but my attention span is very short, so I can__'__t write for that long. __haha_

**Session One**

That night...The night he died...

Paul coughed violently and he waited as his breath came back. Breathing deeply, and shaking a little, he continued.

That night, was the only time he felt so desperate...so helpless...

**Was it also the only time you felt...suicidal?**

Yes...yes...he had felt suicidal. But only because he wanted to help Evie and Matt.

Paul reached for the cup of water and he swallowed painfully.

**But are you sure...you felt suicidal because you wanted to help?**

Paul felt a flare of anger rage up in his chest.

He wanted to die because of Matt! He didn't feel suicidal other than that reason!

**I'm pretty sure you did want to die for Matt...but I'm also sure the feeling of helplessness and desperation...was also along the feeling of being trapped? There was no way out...and you were fed up. Fed up of everything in your life...**

Paul felt another coughing fit coming along and he gripped the table as he painfully coughed and coughed.

He was tired...and he was aching.

**Alright. We shall continue this in the next session. Rest up, and I hope the cold will get better soon.**

Paul nodded and he shakily stood up from the wooden table.

Next session...Paul smiled grimly. Next session he wouldn't be here.

Because by then...by then the world would be dead.

_O__kay, well I__'__m sorry again that was a very short chapter. But I wanted to sort of make people wonder and think more deeply about Paul and what the hell was going on. Lol._

_R&R!! And I__'__ll give you a free cookie (with milk!! __omg_

_And stay tuned!! xxxViolentpop_


	4. The Argument

_Another chapter! Woo! Lol...Remember kids-BRING BACK MIRACLES TO FANFIC! This __dumpshit__ has been dead for a year! Let__'__s take up our story writing brains and WRITE THOSE MIRACLES STORIES! Keep it alive!! there are tons of people out there who seriously want to read new Miracles stuff! I personally know that I__'__m sick of reading the old stuff over and over again! So Bring it back! Don__'__t be a lazy bum! Lol._

_Disclaimer blah blah. But I DO own this Campaign! Anyone who wants to join just holler!_

_And a cookie for __Sherrielynne__!! Thanks!_

_AN: I know that my __chapters__ are weird...but I was sort of aiming for it to make the readers think. Also, they are sort of in drabble form, but they are in the same time sequence (From Paul quitting the Novice to him destroying the world..blah bl__ah._

_Oh and btw, I__'__m currently having my senior exams..TTTT so don__'__t expect another chapter till after...OO...but I__'__ll put one up __asap__!! xxx_

_-------------------------------------------_

After he died, Paul was a changed man.

Alva and Evie could see it clearly. Tommy had told Paul something else...something that no one else knew about. Alva and Evie would talk about it sometimes, trying to find ways to get closer to Paul, to find out. But when they tried, Paul would close down and talk about something else. Then afterwards he would hardly talk at all.

Paul finally snapped when Alva and him were having an argument.

And from then on...all their lives just plummeted down.

--------------------------------

"Paul."

Paul grunted in acknowledgement as he kept on writing out the details of their next case.

"Paul, I need to speak with you." Alva persisted, and he sat down next to the ragged young man.

Paul stopped writing, but kept his face down. He eyed Alva for a while, then he raised his head to look Alva in his eyes.

"Paul...you look tired. When was the last time you slept?"

Paul phased out a bit when he felt the strange feeling of déjà vu. "To be honest," he said, "I can't remember."

Alva sighed. "Paul...Evie and me are worried about you. You've stopped eating...you don't sleep anymore...and you don't seem to be yourself all the time. Why can't you just tell us what happened with you and Tommy?"

Paul's eyes flashed with anger. The first sign of life in those brown eyes for a long time.

"Keel, I've told you and Evie over and over again. Nothing happened."

Alva pressed on. "But surely something happened? Look, Paul, if you only told us, then we can help you! Can't you see we're desperate to help you? Why Can't you see that?"

"See what exactly Alva? What? If you were really concerned about me, you'd leave me alone!" Paul immediately felt foolish at his childish remark, but the raw honesty behind those words affected Alva.

"How can you expect us to leave you alone, if you're killing yourself slowly?"

"What the hell is that supposed to mean?"

Alva slammed his fist down hard on the table. The two men glared at each other.

"If you keep on going like this Paul, you _will_ kill yourself! We are scared, Paul! Scared! That night you died..." Alva's eyes flashed with the pain of the memory. "That night you died, I thought I lost you forever. You know how scared I was? I was thinking, how was I meant to tell Evie? You know how much she loves you Paul? Do you? Do you know how much I care about you?"

"Alva, nothing happened! Tommy just told me that stuff about the Darkness. That's all! Why can't you understand that?"

Alva sighed in frustration and he stood up. "Because Paul, I can see it in your eyes, even now. Something more had happened...Tommy said something vital...and you are betraying our trust because of it. Paul, you are like a brother to me..." Alva looked away and saw Evie standing in the doorway, her eyes glistening with tears. How long she stood there, he didn't know. "And I don't want to lose you again. None of us do."

-----------------------------

_Sorry for short chapter again...But as __i__ said, I have very short attention span...TT _

_I hope the chapter was good though! R&R!!!_


	5. The Darkness is Coming

_Hey there guys! It's moi again! OK sorry for the long wait...But I seriously thought this was a dead story...Until a certain someone revived it! ;)_

_Anyway, here is the next installment. (It is set in 2008-present time...although it is a few weeks after the Matt incident...Lol. Please excuse the minor time warping. --) I hope you all enjoy!_

_--_

I was losing my mind.

I couldn't do this anymore. I mean, how could I? Ever since I left the church to work for Keel, my sixth sense has gone in overdrive. I practically walk with Death everyday and every night, I see spirits and restless ghost, I feel their pain...and I feel _my _pain.

After the incident with Matt, I just couldn't deal with anything anymore. I felt fatigued the whole time and apathetic. I just wanted to go into a deep slumber and never wake up. Or run away to Antarctica or someplace remote.

But that's just it. I couldn't run away from this. I couldn't just close my eyes and hope for all this to go away. It was there, right in front of me. And the thing that was making me so frustrated was the fact that no matter how hard I tried, no matter how much pain I cause others and myself, it won't go away. It never will.

Eventually the Darkness will come.

And everyone and thing will die.

--

"2012?"

"Yes." Alva looked up from his notes and glanced at me over his glasses.

I ran a hand though my hair and sighed. "You're saying that in four years time, the world is going to end?"

"That is what I am trying to imply, Paul." Alva stood up and stretched. He grabbed his nearly empty coffee cup and swirled the cold remains with distaste.

I stared. "Are you bullshitting me, Keel?"

"No. I am not joking around." Seeing the disbelief on my face, Keel set down his cup and leant closer towards me. "Tommy, the signs, the events happening around the world, wars, and disasters...What more proof do you need, Paul? It's coming, and I can assure you that it _will_ be _big_."

"But why 2012?" I followed as Keel walked out of his office and towards the coffee machine. "Why that exact date? And why are you so sure?"

"The Mayans, Paul. The Bible, the Ancient Romanians, Medieval England, and even the internet. Predictions and prophecies made from all over history come together with one simple message. Something huge will happen in 2012. The date matches, and so does the reasons. Coincidence? I think not." Alva sipped his steaming coffee and glanced at Evie who was tapping away at her computer.

I swallowed hard and squeezed the bridge of my nose, wearily. "So...this Darkness. It's basically the end of the world?"

"Yes. However, there have been speculations about the world leaders knowing about this. Apparently, they have even made safe bases underground to house billions of people."

"It's Ok then! Everyone can evacuate to those bases!"

Alva sipped and shook his head slowly. "No. They would only house people who are beneficial-doctors, officials, officers, soldiers, scientists, top professors, and so on. If these bases are real and if the world leaders do know what is going to happen, then it is most likely that they will keep it secret from the people of earth until the very last minute."

We went back to his office and sat down at his large mahogany desk.

"But that would mean billions will die!"

"Think about it Paul!" Alva put his cup down harshly. "This is a great opportunity to start a new world! And how can the world leaders reveal this sort of information without chaos and pandemonium happening all over the world? They would save money and order that way."

I slammed my fist onto the desk. "How can you talk like that?" I trembled then dropped my head into my hands, rubbing my eyes. A head ache had started throbbing behind my eyes several minutes ago. It had intensified into a sharp, painful start to a severe ache.

Alva's voice softened. "Paul...It is to be. The Darkness has been coming for a very long time. And realistically, we are the only ones who can change the way it is going to play out."

A long silence followed.

After a while I raised my head, wearily, and blinked. "What are you talking about, Keel?"

"I'm talking about the chosen ones, Paul. _You_ are one of the chosen few to survive this. I will assist you of course and so will Evie." Keel smiled and rested an reassuring hand on my arm. "It will be alright. You will get through this and we will help as many people as we can. Trust me, we will come out of the other side in victory."  
"How?" I asked in a quiet voice.

Keel grinned. "First, research. Then...then we prepare."  
--

_Well that's all for today! Lol. Please review and I will put up another chapter!_

_AN____ The 2012 Doomsday theory is in fact the real deal. There are many speculations and talks about this. Why is this one so special? How are you so sure it won't be another false Doomsday? I know for sure that the 2012 Theory has never been spoken about so widely and so spread throughout the whole world. We cannot know for sure. According to some reports by Government officials, the world leaders ARE hiding something! Something devastating and horrific will happen in 2012 and the officials are preparing for it themselves-building underground cities and bases silently...quietly..._

Aside from that, I hope you enjoyed today's Chapter!! Thanks for reading, and remember BRING BACK MIRACLES FANFIC! After reading this, don't go back and read something else!! Instead, go and make your own miracles FANFIC!! You can do it! We need more!

xxxxx


	6. Upcoming

_Let's get straight into it!! :D_

_AN: I do not know for sure what Paul had used when he cut his hand when Matt disappeared...But I guess it was a knife of some sort. _

_OK here we go! This chapter is a short lead up to the next chapter which is a HUGE chapter full of answers and what the future holds for Paul!  
_

--

The night was still.

Silence lingered thick in the air like heavy smoke and the air stood so still that it felt like breathing concrete.

Paul knew something big was going to happen. It was always like this before he underwent emotional upheaval or physical suffering of some sort. It had something to do with his sixth sense...and he hated it.

Staring glumly at the TV screen, he swirled his beer around in his hand and glugged the last of the dregs down, trying to clear his constricted throat.

This depression was making him go crazy. He felt caged and trapped like a wild animal in the zoo. The minutes ticked by slowly and sludgy and every day was torment. He couldn't get out of this paradox though. He was trapped for real. And aside from the torment, he could feel nothing. He was numb through and through, as if someone had replaced his heart with a heavy stone. Sometimes he would grab his chest, suddenly afraid that his heart had stopped. Other times he would grab the edge of the glass table, so that he could feel the pain of the glass cutting into his hands.

Paul glared at his empty beer bottle and he dropped it to the ground, sighing. He wished sorely now that he had stayed with Tommy on the Other Side when he had the chance. He felt a pang of regret and guilt as he thought about Tommy...

"Shit Paul...Get a hold of yourself!"

He leant forwards and rested his elbows on his knees, burying his face in his hands as he did so. He rubbed his tired eyes and held his hands up to his mouth, staring blankly at the wall opposite.

He remembered what Keel had yelled when he had sliced open his own hand so many weeks ago.

_He gritted his teeth as he dug into his hand with the knife, the blood spilling onto the handkerchief blossoming like a red flower in mid-springtime._

"_What are you doing!?" Paul glanced up and saw Keel rushing towards him, face pale. Keel pulled him away from the handkerchief, trying to shake some sense into him as he did so._

"_Are you trying to kill yourself!?"_

And death was looking quite inviting right about now.

Before Paul could linger too deep into his dark thoughts, the phone rang, making him jump in shock.

He quickly reached the phone and picked it up.

"Hello?"

_"Paul?"_

Paul stopped still. No...it couldn't be! He stayed silent, mouth dry and heart thumping, not knowing what to say or do.

_"Paul...Oh God...Paul, it's me! It's dad!"_



--

Alva Keel and Evie Santos were up at the HQ already, sorting through potential cases that poisoned the cities and towns. So far they had about twenty potentials and fifty fakes, and Paul was nowhere to be seen.

"He's late." Keel contemplated lightly.

Evie hummed under her breath as she stacked the folders together. "Hmm...He should be here..."

The pair finished up in silence and just as they were finished, the door creaked open.

Evie glanced up and saw Paul enter. The first thing that hit her was his face. He was pallid and slightly grey, and he looked as if he hadn't slept for days. And then it hit her that he was shivering.

"Paul?" Keel also noticed and he went up to him, a concerned look on his face.

Evie followed and she laid a hand on his arm. "Hey...we missed you..."

Paul stared blankly past them both and he swayed slightly.

"Paul?" Keel said, urgency and alarm more prominent in his voice. "Paul, what happened?"

Paul looked at Keel unsteadily and shook his head. "I...I found out."

Evie glanced at Keel, confused and shocked. "Found out? Found out what, Paul?"

"I..."Paul visibly swallowed. "I know what I am. I know who I am..." He paused, struggling. "I know why I'm supposed to survive, Keel. I know everything."

Keel's brows furrowed deeply. "_Know what_?" He grabbed his shoulder, steadying him. "What happened, Paul?"

A brief silence followed then Paul answered in a quiet voice. "My father told me the truth."

--

_Preview of Next Chapter:_

It all started with a man called Peter and a woman called Marianne.

Peter was only 22 when he fell in love with Marianne, and Marianne was only 19. They were the happiest people alive when they were together, and soon they got married.

Their first child was named John and the family lived quite happily and peacefully until one day, a tragedy hit the young parent's lives.

John, only 3 years old, died in a hit and run.

Marianne stopped eating and she lay in bed all day, too weak and too depressed to live anymore. Peter watched on, helpless and in torment. He prayed to God everyday and he wished for a miracle.

One year later, Peter's prayers were answered.

The couple had another son, whom they named Paul.

Paul Andersson was the miracle that saved Marianne's life.

--

_Hey guys! Thanks for reading! Hope you liked. Next chapter should be a tad bit longer and I will answer ALL the questions then!_

_Review please! Cheers!_

_xxxxxxxxxxx_


	7. The Revelation

_**Disclaimer: I don't own Miracles blah blah but hell I wish I did.**_

_**--**_

_Finally. Here it is. The chapter that explains everything. This is my theory of what Miracles is about. :D__ It's got some Harry Potter influences in it, but it seemed to be the only thing that fit. Sorry for being so uncreative. XD I wasn't sure what format to put this chapter in...should I make it a flashback? Should I make it Paul telling the story to Keel and Evie? Should I make it a third person format? What? I decided to put a bit more effort into this chapter and make it a flashback. This might take up more than one chapter...we'll have to see. Hope you like. And sorry for the long wait!! Please review! If it weren't for you guys reviewing, I wouldn't be writing this chapter!! :D_

_Remember: BRING MIRACLES BACK!_

_**--**_

_**PCPCPCPCPCPCPCPCPCPCPCPCPCPCPCPCPCPCPCPCPC**_

_**--**_

The man was a strict Catholic man. He was a man who went against all stereotypical men. A tall, slim Italian with long black hair and delicate creamy skin. He was soft-spoken, thoughtful and dark. If it wasn't for the hints of masculinity on his body and face, people would have mistaken him for a (some what pretty) woman. If someone asked the man what he most liked about himself, he would most probably reply "My eyes." They were indeed, the best features he had. Some people, if you asked them, would say that they were the eyes of the devil. Others would say they were the eyes of a broken man. While some would say they were the eyes of a fallen angel. His eyes didn't have a definite color. It was a deep, inky black that sometimes flashed purple. However, if you glanced at them, you might catch a glimpse of flashing gold and blinding white. It differed for everyone.

He was only 22 when he saw her.

He remembered seeing her at the pew, her head bowed and her golden hair cascading over her face. He had walked up to where she prayed and he kneeled down next to her, bowing his head while trying to catch a glimpse at her hidden features. They stayed like that for over fifteen minutes. Both curious about the other, and both trying to figure out each other's facial features. After a struggling fight, he stood up and sat back on the wooden bench. The mysterious woman muttered her finishing prayer and she too sat back on the bench. The two stared at each other.

She was an angel. Her eyes were bright blue, flashing and blinding him. Her lips, a soft rose pink color, and her skin was a delicate white. Her hair flowed around her head like a halo and he half expected to see a pair of majestic white wings to uncurl from her back. She was wearing a sea blue dress that stopped short of her knees and a small silver cross hung at her slim neck, catching the candlelight and winking at him every now and then.

He saw innocence and golden radiance in her eyes. It made him feel hot and cold. It made him feel safe.

She saw vulnerability and terrible suffering in his eyes. It made her feel hot and cold. It made her feel protective.

She was only 19.

He was only 22.

_**--**_

Marianne loved scrapbooking. Ever since she was a young child, she would gather up photos and random bits and bobs and stick them in her scrapbook. Right now, she was making a new scrapbook. But this one was special. It was a scrapbook of her and Peter's first child. Jonathon Peter Andersson. He was the star, the light of their lives. The answer to their questioning love. The reward and gift from God. He was 3 

years old. An age where incoherent blabber slowly evolved into words and broken sentences. His first word was "Paul". Paul was John's teddy bear. Funnily enough, it was John who named his bear Paul. Marianne and Peter could not figure out where John had heard the name from. They didn't have any relatives who were named Paul. "But we do read the Bible to John. Maybe it's from there?" Peter had suggested. Marianne agreed. And that was that.

_**--**_

It was a phone call from Marianne. Peter was at work-his music studio in town-when he got the call. The call was the one thing that changed his life forever. The call was the beginning of the end. The start of a string of chaotic tragedies, that can only be called as the devil's work.

"Hello?"

_Peter..._

"Oh hi, honey."

_Peter..._

"Mari?"

_Peter..._

"Marianne? What's wrong?"

_Peter...It's John..._

"What?"  
_John...It's...Oh my God..._

"Marianne? Marianne, what's going on?"

_He...It was so fast...I couldn't...Oh my God..._

"What was fast? What happened? Marianne? Where's John?"

_John...It was like a dream. Like a nightmare..._

"Please Marianne, tell me. What happened?"

_He's gone...Just like that...So fast._

"What? Where are you Marianne? I'm coming to get you."

_John...Peter...JOHN! He's DEAD!_

"Marianne..."

_HE'S DEAD! HE'S DEAD! HE'S DEAD! IT WAS SO FAST! _

"_MARIANNE!"_

_THE CAR JUST DROVE ON! IT WAS SO FAST! SO FAST!_

"_MARIANNE!"_

_Click_

_Beep Beep Beep Beep Beep_

"_Mari...Marianne?"_

_**--**_

_**PCPCPCPCPCPCPCPCPCPCPCPCPCPCPCPCPCPCPCPCPCPC**_

_**--**_

"Wait...you had a brother?"

Paul shrugged. "Apparently," he said, heavily.

Keel stared at him. "It's not in the records," he said.

"Let him finish," Evie said softly.

Paul sighed and ran a hand over his tired eyes. "So...John was my elder brother. He was killed by a drunk driver. It was a hit and run. No one knew who the driver was and no one saw him again. Marianne-

my...mother...I guess (Paul grimaced and his mouth twitched into a sad smile)-sunk into deep depression. She couldn't do anything. Just lie in bed and try to live another day." He paused as he gazed out of the window and over the grey, rain washed city. It was one in the afternoon and it had only been thirteen hours since he met his father for the first time in over twenty years.

Keel coughed awkwardly and Evie shot Keel a dirty look.

Paul turned back to his friends. "Peter...my biological father...dad...didn't know what to do. He went searching for answers-"

"Answers?" Keel's forehead creased.

"Er...praying...for answers."

"Ah."

"A year later Marianne conceived another child. Another year later the child was born."

"That child, I assume, would be you?" Keel noted.

"Yeah. Apparently, all was well for about six months. Then..." Paul gave out a tired and somewhat angry laugh. "Peter was driving to meet Marianne. I was in the car with him. And...well...a truck collided with the car."

A flash of blinding light.

Blaring horns.

Screaming.

Piercing pain.

Paul winced and held a hand up to his head.

"Paul?" Keel laid a hand on his shoulder.

He shrugged off the sudden head ache and continued.

_**--**_

_**PCPCPCPCPCPCPCPCPCPCPCPCPCPCPCPCPCPCPCPCPCPCPCPCPC**_

_**--**_

He would have dreams. Dreams that made no sense. Dreams that he hid along with his darkest fears and secrets. The dream had filled in the missing blanks of his memories. It explained his destiny.

_**--**_

Peter!

_Paul...My dear son...Paul._

Peter...What happened to me? To us?

_Please...Call me Dad._

Dad?

_We were both dead, Paul. We were in Limbo for a while. Awaiting our fate. _

What happened?

_I couldn't bear to see you dead. You hadn't seen life yet, and I knew you were meant for larger things. You had a destiny like no other, son._

Destiny?

_I made a deal._

Deal? With who?

_Lucifer of course._

The devil? But...How could you? Why would you do that?

_I had to, Paul! In order for you to live...in order for your mother to live, I had to._

So you gave up your soul to the devil.

_That's right._

Who said being alive was better than being dead?

_Paul...You mustn't speak like that._

Well isn't it true? I've been put through so much pain and losses. Is it really worth it? Is it?

_You are sounding like your mother. Please, Paul. Try to understand. You are meant for bigger things._

Bigger things? Bullshit.

_I did it for you and Marianne._

You did it for Marianne. Not me.

_I did it for both of you. I gave up eternity in paradise for eternity in hell. For you._

...Sorry.

_I love you Paul. You know that, right?_

Yeah...I do.

_I know you hardly knew me. But I am still your father. And I still love you as my son._

I love you too.

_Paul?_

Yeah?

_I'm so very sorry._

For what?

_For the pain that is yet to come._

What do you mean?

_You are the only one on this earth who carries the world's pain._

The world's pain?

_You are the healer, Paul. The healer who sacrifices himself for the world._

Is that my destiny?

_No. That is who you are right now._

Then what's my destiny?

_To die._

_**--**_

_**PCPCPCPCPCPCPCPCPCPCPCPCPCPCPCPCPCPCPCPCPCPCPCPCPCPCPC**_

_**--**_

"Matris Vitualamen," Paul said suddenly.

"Mother's Sacrifice?" Keel said.

"Yeah. Matris Vitualamen."

"What about it, Paul?" Said Evie.

He glanced at the clock that lay on the paint peeled wall. It was two.

"Matris Vitualamen has been referred to in millions of books, films, and music. The public knows it, but no one actually knows what it's really about." Paul held a hand to his head as the room tilted for a second. "Urgh...Um...Matris Vitualamen. A good example is Harry Potter." He closed his eyes. The headache was getting worse. Maybe he was coming down with the flu or something?

Keel coughed and took over. " It is said that the mother's love for her child is the strongest in the world. If it could be measured in power, it would be enough to light up the entire earth for years."

"That's sweet, Alva," Evie smiled. "But I don't see what this has to do with Paul."

"I'm getting there. It is also said that when a mother sacrifices herself for her child-Matris Vitualamen-the child will be protected from any sort of evil for the rest of their life."



Paul nodded. "I was affected by the Matris Vitualamen. I was eleven when it happened. The unexplainable curse that was affecting our family had struck again. I remember...It came back to me so clearly when he told me."

"He? Your father?"

"Yeah. My foster father." Paul gave a small smile then continued. "There was this small shop we'd used to go to. Me and Marianne. There was this old man who used to always greet us at the door and give me a piece of sweet whenever we went there. Marianne would always chat with the old man for a while, and I remember this huge plastic train that the old man had next to his counter. It was full of toys for sale, and I would always play with them. Sometimes the old man would let me keep one. One day...one day, there was this man. He...I couldn't remember his face. But I did remember how scared I was. There was screaming and yelling. I remember the man had a gun and he fired some shots. I don't remember what happened to the old man. But...I think he was already dead when we came to the shop. The man was about to shoot me. I couldn't do anything. I was too scared. Then...Marianne took it for me. The shot. The shot that was meant to kill me killed her." Paul stared down at his hands. "Matris Vitualamen."

"So you were protected from all evil for a while I gather?" Keel said softly.

"Yeah. I was." A long pause. Then, "I was taken into a foster home. There was this guy...Max Callan. He raised me for five years. I came to know him as my dad. He had adopted me as well. When I was fourteen. But...when I was sixteen, I came home to find him gone. He had disappeared. I got sent to an orphanage and I was raised by...well you know. Poppy."

"Do you know what happened to him? Max?" Evie asked.

"Well...I saw Max last night. He tracked me down. He was the one who told me who I was and what had happened to me. He told me he had reasons for disappearing like that." Paul gave a sour laugh. "I really don't want to know."

"Paul, what do you mean you _were_ protected from evil?" Keel asked, suddenly.

Paul shrugged. "When I heard of the Matris Vitualamen, it explained a whole lot of shit."

"Which is...?"

"Well, this is my theory. I think that after I went to the other side to see Tommy, the Matris Vitualamen wore off somehow."

"Why do you think that?"

"I...No reason really. It's just a theory."

"Paul?"

"Just a theory, Keel."

_**--**_

_**PCPCPCPCPCPCPCPCPCPCPCPCPCPCPCPCPCPCPCPCPCPCPCPCPCPCPCPC**_

_**--**_

After he went to the other side to see Tommy, he started having dreams. Not just normal, nightmarish dreams-but dreams that made his heart pound madly. That made him lose his voice for days due to screaming painfully in his sleep. That made him bite down on his tongue so hard that he'd wake up choking on blood. That made him start to see things and hear things that wasn't a part of reality or a dream. The devil was taking hold of his mind. The devil was taking hold of Paul's destiny.

The dreams told him exactly what he was. A pawn. A pawn in the chess game of life.

The dreams told him his destiny.

He was a messenger. A messenger of the Darkness. He was a messenger of the end of the world. And at the end of the world he is to live. He is meant to live-along with the others who were chosen.



The chosen few who have been sent the message "God is Nowhere", written in their own blood.

The chosen few who are the Darkness.

_**--**_

_**PCPCPCPCPCPCPCPCPCPCPCPCPCPCPCPCPCPCPCPCPCPCPCPCPCPCPCPCPCPC**_

_**--**_

_AN-:D __Hey all!! I hope you enjoyed this chapter. It didn't take me long to type it up (or maybe it's because I had so much fun writing it!! :D__) and I'm amazed at how long this chappy is! The next chappy...I dunno what to write really. If you have any ideas, then please review!! I appreciate you guys for sticking with me. I really enjoyed writing this story. :)_

_Love you all!_

_Review please! :D_

_Love always,_

_Violentpop._

_**--**_

**Paul: **_(Crossing his arms)_ God I sound so depressed in this story. I'm not really. See? _(Cheesy grin) _And why is it I always get hit in the head? I know this doesn't have anything to do with this chapter...but it's been bugging me for a while now. I mean, sure it's a trademark thing, but hell, it's quite painful. Why not change it to something less damaging? I mean, I could have brain trauma you know. Head injuries aren't to be taken lightly. No wonder I'm so depressed in this story. I mean, I do get knocked out repeatedly. Who wouldn't be depressed? _(Sighs and stares out of window gloomily)_

_**--**_

We all love you Paul-Depressed or not depressed! But you do have to agree-Solemn Paul is quite sexy! :P

_**--**_

_Until next chapter...So long! xox_


End file.
